“still, the profound change has come upon them: rooted, they grip down and begin to awaken.”
Learn to value yourself, which means: to fight for your happiness
-Ayn Rand
It seems strange to start writing this, as though I haven’t been a writer my entire life, as if it were not my chosen career to reveal all of my thoughts for others to see. The funny thing about being a writer is its vulnerability, because otherwise, I am not a vulnerable person, nor would I generally offer up information of myself without being asked. No one here is asking, though, so things change.
The reason that I have started this blog is because, like millions of others in the world, I have taken on a spiritual quest in my life to discover what exactly I want from my life, how I want to get it, and how I plan on getting there. Four months ago – February 25th, if we’re counting (and believe me, we’re counting!), I decided to quit drinking. This had been a long-time coming, and sort of unbelievably necessary. At the same time, I decided to run a race (the Warrior Dash) which led to me discovering the Spartan Race although, at last minute, I didn’t end up running that race. Regardless, it started a whole new level of training for me and entirely changed my attitude towards life. I have been a gym rat for many years now but this was something entirely new; the training evolved into a whole new lifestyle, a way to live my life completely. That is where the present finds me – four months sober, 10 pounds lighter, and in the middle of an out and out spiritual spring cleaning. I guess I wanted to start this blog to give myself a space to talk about the things I love most: working out, self-growth, and writing. This blog will be a space for me to explore the choices I have made and continue to make, and my work-outs because, when it comes down to it, my work-outs are the core of the person I am and define the life that I live. It will also be a place for my writing, in all of its forms, wherever I feel I want to take it. I am currently a Creative Writing Major (as well as a Child Studies Major, but that’s a whole other passion!) and am discovering my own voice in writing.
All of this stuff came about because I chose to quit drinking and I feel like it is important for me to really take part and engage in this process. I can sense myself changing, and I can see myself changing, which means that my life around me is also changing. The fact that I am no longer drinking, and focusing all of my energies (creative, physical, and mental) into working out and writing has changed my relationships with the people around me. In some ways, it has distanced me from a lot of my core group of friends but it has also allowed for me to develop deeper, more intimate relationships and that has been exciting. In so many ways, I have been living in a stupor, really, because my energies were so convoluted and mixed up. Now I feel like I am set free; I am experiencing myself and my life in amplified volume, in vibrant colours and sounds. This is good and bad because things are often overwhelming, especially because I have always been such an emotional person. Some days I am not quite sure what to do with the world around me, that never quits breathing, pulsating, moving, talking – it’s enough to make my head feel crowded and my senses overloaded! Anyway, this is the journey and when I get more organized, and figure out this blogging thing, I will probably have this more separated so I can talk about my writing and working out without it being so divided.
ofmindbodyandspirit 